As quickly as swine flu swept the AJC’s headlines, so has it given way to more important stories like “Atlanta says no to adult video store.” Many local residents even forgot that they finally thought they had the excuse they needed to be super racist, festively donning their finest green, white, and red leis and Mardi Gras beads on Tuesday so they could puke congealed queso in the On the Border parking lot.
Sarah the pig
Last week, we kept waiting for Mark Davis to diversify AJC’s breathless coverage of the outbreak and craft us a heartwarming tale of the eponymous species told from the perspective of Sarah, the therapy pig at Noah’s Ark. Or we thought he might weave a conceit that relates the terror of riding the Pink Pig to the fear of being stricken with the new strain of virus. He might even use the phrase “present perilous porcine pandemic panic.” But our good friend and loyal reader Mark Davis never fulfilled our simple wishes.
So we raced to the next best online news sources, the blog and website of the Socialist Swine. You might know him better as the pig who gets walked in Piedmont Park. Sometimes he wears a t-shirt. (You didn’t know he is a socialist, did you? That pig loves taxes and universal health care. And polyester blankets. Look it up.) But because he hasn’t updated his blog since 2006 we don’t really have much to report. Has he endured specism and discrimination in this trying time of infection? Has he had to learn to waddle a little faster to escape the frightened scorn of the park’s baton twirlers and roller bladers? Only Mark Davis can answer these questions.
Previously: Double D
Tags: mark davis, piedmont park, socialist swine, swine flu
I am gratified no end that some discerning readers remain in our circulation base. When news of the swine flu broke — when it became obvious this was no mere case of sniffly snouts — I wondered if my many bosses would ask the obvious question, i.e., “What is Davis doing?” (They ask that a lot.)
And the follow-up query: “How is this affecting area pigs?” I was ready to squeal out of the parking lot for the nearest hog parlor to investigate. At the very least, I could go to the zoo and check on the warthogs, Vern and Alice. After all, a pernicious pandemic imperiled our porkers. Call it hamthrax; others are.
Instead, MMB had other plans for AJC writer Mark Davis. These days, I am contributing to our Sunday newspaper. Surely you get the AJC? Yes?
I only read the Family Circus and the Franklin Mint ads in Parade magazine on Sundays.
The Franklin Mint ads are just one of many, many attractions found inside the pages of your Sunday Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
Like confusing pictures of food? No, thank you. I will stick to my commemorative plates and PJ’s wacky antics.
What? And forgo Beetle Bailey? I urge you to unplug this Sunday and take some time with your new, and improved, Atlanta Journal-Constitution.